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From the Desk of the Unimonster...

From the Desk of the Unimonster...

Welcome everyone to the Unimonster’s Crypt! Well, the winter’s chill has settled into the Crypt, and your friendly Unimonster won’t stop shivering until May! To take my mind off the cold, we’re going to take a trip into the future … the future of Star Trek! Star Trek was the Unimonster’s first love, and we’ll examine that in this week’s essay. We’ll also inaugurate a new continuing column for The Unimonster’s Crypt, one written by the Uni-Nephew himself! This week he examines one of his favorite films, one that, quite frankly, failed to impress his uncle, Jordan Peele’s Nope. So enjoy the reading and let us hear from you, live long and prosper, and … STAY SCARY!

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Showing posts with label Zombies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Zombies. Show all posts

05 October, 2014

Bobbie's, "Movies to Look For"-- Rockabilly Zombie Weekend (2013)



Rockabilly Zombie Weekend

Reviewed by:  Bobbie

Becky (Christina Bach) and Grant (Daniel Baldock), two young rockabilly lovers, want to get hitched at an outdoor venue.  Unbeknownst to them, earlier that same day, two ‘Men in Black’ types from the Government ordered a local crop duster to hose down the surrounding areas with an experimental mosquito spray to stop the spread of West Nile Virus.  Little did anyone know that those two MIB types were unleashing something far more deadly that the Virus!

Despite Becky’s mother, a waitress who gives hand-jobs for extra cash behind the diner, and Grant’s mother, a rich-bitch type who tells Grant he’s too good for the likes of that trashy Becky, these two love-birds decide to go forward with the nuptials.  Surrounded by their best buds, beer and swarms of blood-sucking mosquitoes, they pledge their trough.  Well, almost.  As they get to the “I do” part, a zombie attack is suddenly upon the gathered group!  Will Becky and Grant escape the ghastly, flesh-chomping hoards!?!  And what about their friends!?!  Their families!?!  Will they survive the … Rockabilly Zombie Weekend?!
Sound exciting?  Wellll ... it’s not as grim as I assumed it would be from the title.  Andy S. Montejo, who did the cinematography, certainly knows his way around a camera and camera angles!  And the acting, other than the two MIB types, was certainly semi-professional.  The script, however, was shop-worn and included many stereotypical plot points.  Zombies invading a hospital?  Check!  Grizzled old man showing the fleeing lovers who has the most guns?  Check!  Loved one being torn apart and consumed?  Check!  Military intervention?  Check!

However, the music by Killer Moonshine was toe-tapping fun!  And the special effects, although heavily dependent on computer effects, was stomach churning.  Jaime Velez Soto directs from a screenplay penned by Tammy Bennett.  The aforementioned Christina Bach (Cassadaga), along with J. LaRose (Insidious), Michelle Elise (Vaudeville Comedy, Then and Now), Randy Molnar (The Tenant) and Daniel Baldock (Bigfoot and Other Adventures) star.

Rockabilly Zombie Weekend opened in Orlando Florida at the Plaza Cinema on Sunday, February 17, 2013.  According to movie blog Sonic Electric “Originally slated for 2 theaters, demand was so great, a total of five theaters were needed to debut the film.  Actors in costume (military uniform), escorted (evacuated), ticket-holders to their respective theaters.”  Rockabilly Zombie Weekend has been making its way around the country, playing at midnight theater showings and, I imagine, a few remaining drive-in theaters.  It has been released on DVD and can be purchased at the official web-site [http://www.rockabillyzombieweekend.com/].  If you like classic cars, beehive hair-dos, hooker shoes, rockabilly music, zombies and knocking back a few brews, then this just might the movie for you!


Bobbie




Trash Palace Dumpster: Z Nation (2014 - SyFy)

Z Nation

Reviewed by: Bobbie Culbertson

It should come as no surprise that in this era of zombie TV programs that dominate the Nation’s sets, that the SyFy channel, in conjunction with distributor The Asylum (Sharknado, Sharknado 2), would give viewers Z Nation.

Z Nation has all the requirements of a zombie program in that it does have zombies.  Hoards of fast moving zombies!  And there’s no shortage of carnage either!  Heads explode, torn limbs fly akimbo and 90% of the time the screen is fairly dripping with blood.  The violence is ridiculously graphic.  It strives to cram into each episode as much gore and violence as possible even if that means it has more guts than brains.

And, as usual, we have survivors trying to get one man, Murphy (Keith Allen), whose blood might cure the hellish apocalypse from New York to California.  A nice bit of action in that it will take lots of time for them to complete the trip and mean more time for lots of action.  However, what Z Nation does not have is a cohesive script.  Plot points come up often but as just as often left to die on the vine.  The audience is left to figure out why getting this one guy to the West Coast is humanity’s only hope after having just having been told there is no cure.  Dialogue meant to be pithy instead seems instead cribbed from other bad films.  And the characters?  The usual rag-tag group consisting of bikers, madmen and phony messiahs, a couple of Zombieland-esque college-aged kids, tough guys and tougher women all going mano-a-mano to show who has the biggest “set.”

This is the show for viewers who abandoned The Walking Dead after season 2 because all that talkin’ hurt their thinkers.  However, there is one shining bit that saves this and that is Citizen Z (DJ Qualls) who, as the last holdout Air Force grunt at an abandoned North Pole Army base, acts as the survivor’s eye-in-the-sky while spinning stacks of wax for their amusement.

Z Nation might do well to have a running banner across the bottom of the screen reading “homage ... homage ... homage” as to not get sued by AMC.  Let’s look at the similarities:

1. Zombie infested prison?  Check!
2. Bus loads of zombie children?  Check!
3. Possibly egomaniacal village leader?  Check!
4. Desperate attempt to deliver the one person capable of ending the apocalypse?  Check!
5. Shooting a child to save the survivors?  Check!
6. Cannibalism?  Check!

However, with a zombie baby in episode 1 “Puppies and Kittens” (yes, the zombies are referred to as that!) and exploding oil tanks filled with zombies in episode 2 “Fracking Zombies, the 13-week run should seem short to those whose zombie needs are met with 2-dimensional FPS video game accuracy.  Z Nation is the best thing that could have happened to The Walking Dead!  And that ain’t bad!

Bobbie







06 March, 2011

Junkyardfilm.com's Moldy Oldie Movie of the Month: NIGHT OF THE CREEPS

Title:  NIGHT OF THE CREEPS

Year of Release—Film:  1986




It's 1959 and two young lovebirds are stargazing in Lover's Lane when, suddenly, a blazing meteorite falls from the sky.  Intrigued, the young man drives closer to the site and, leaving his frightened date in the car, goes to investigate.  He finds the crash-site and leaning over it, the mysterious object suddenly opens and spits out an over-sized black garden slug right into the young man's mouth!  Meanwhile, back at the car, the young woman is becoming increasingly alarmed when she hears on the radio that an axe-wielding lunatic has escaped from the asylum nearby.  And, as if on cue, he appears behind the car, swinging the axe with deadly accuracy.  Roll credits.

Fast-forward to 1986.  It's springtime at a Southern college campus and two social out-casts yearn to belong to a fraternity... mainly because one of them, Chris (Jason Lively), has fallen hard for the girlfriend of would-be frat brother, Brad (Allen Kayser) who's in charge of the new membership drive.  Chris' friend, cane-using smart-mouth JC (Steve Marshall) approaches the frat brothers to introduce himself to them and Chris to Cynthia (Jill Whitlow) and learns that, in order to join the fraternity, he and Chris will have to steal a corpse and leave it on a rival frat house's doorsteps.  After the duo leaves, a frat brother asks Brad if he's going to let these dorks join and, laughing a no, Brad drives off with Cynthia.

Later that night, Chris and JC break into a secret lab and discover a corpse in a liquid-filled glass tank.  Turning off the room-sized computer that controls the tank, they release the body inside, only to discover, to their horror, the body begins to twitch as the eyes open.  Terrified, they flee the building without the required frat entry fee.  Back in their shared dorm room, they discuss the night's events, unaware that the re-animated corpse is wandering around Campus, seeking victims.  His first would-be victim turns out to be Cynthia as his head splits open, spilling out hundreds of alien slugs!  Cynthia's cat has its face eaten off!

Enter Detective Ray Cameron (Tom Atkins) who begins every conversation and investigation with the words "Thrill me.”  Thrilled he's not at discovering a headless naked corpse on the doorstep of a sorority house.  After interrogating a janitor at the Lab where the body was being held, the Detective brings in for questioning Chris and JC.  But, upon hearing from the janitor that the two ran from the building "screaming like banshees" but corpseless, he lets them go.  And, the next day, The Brad-ster is equally not thrilled when he hears of the body being left at the wrong house!  Confronting Chris and JC, he demands an explanation and when JC replies, "It's as funny as a crutch,” Brad kicks JC's crutches out from under him.  Cynthia, seeing this, flips Brad off and leaves with Chris and JC, unaware that the Campus is being over-run with outer-space alien, brain-eating garden slugs!
The next day, Cynthia tells Chris and JC about her faceless zombie cat and about a rumor about a body buried under the House Mother's cabin.  As Chris walks Cynthia back to her sorority, they run into Det. Cameron who's over-heard the entire story.  Det. Cameron tells Chris that back in 1959, he broke up with his girlfriend to go into police work.  This is the same girl who was killed by the axe-wielding escaped lunatic in 1959.  He tells of how he tracked down the killer, killed him and buried the body on the same spot where the House Mother's cabin now sits.  Just then, a phone call informs the detective that the House Mother has just been killed by a body crawling out from under her cabin floor.  The killer is cornered and Cameron blows off its zombie head, releasing hundreds of slithering slugs.

The next night as Chris is getting dressed to take Cynthia to the spring formal, he spots a tape recorder with a sign "listen" taped to it.  It's a message from JC who tells Chris that his brain is being used as an incubator for the alien slugs and the only way to kill them was by fire.  Running to Cameron's house (where he unknowingly thwarts the detective's suicide attempt), he tells him about the taped message.  Turning off the gas oven and grabbing his gun, the detective with Chris in tow, rushes down to the police station and "commandeer" a flame-thrower.  Remembering that Cynthia had told him about a dorm-mate storing jars of brains in the basement, they rush to the sorority house.  Ordering everyone out of the house, the detective goes to the basement, armed with a filled gasoline can.  Meanwhile, outside, the zombies are coming!  Handing Cynthia the flame-thrower, Chris takes careful aim and shoots each zombie through the head, at which time Cynthia cooks their brains with the flame-thrower!  Spotting more slugs racing into the house's basement, they run downstairs to discover Detective Cameron with tape over his mouth, splashing gasoline around a mountain of slithering slugs while counting down from 20.  Chris and Cynthia rush from the house with seconds to spare.  Then KABLOOEY!  The house explodes!  Chris and Cynthia share a kiss as the camera pans down to the House Mother's dog who coughs up an alien slug.  The End!

The original ending showing Chris and Cynthia standing in front of the burning house while the charred body of Det. Cameron shambles down the street and stopping, only to have his head explode and the alien slugs slither into a nearby cemetery wasn't shown theatrically but is included on the official 2009 DVD release by Sony Pictures.

Fred Dekker had a short career as a director, making only three movies and directing one episode of Tales from the Crypt.  NIGHT OF THE CREEPS was his debut effort.  Shot in only seven days on a budget of $5,000,000 it pulled in a paltry $600,000 at the box office.  Maybe if Try-Star had put some effort and time behind advertising it, this movie would have been better received.  It deserves better.  NIGHT OF THE CREEPS shows Dekker's love of old 50's sci-fi movies by paying homage to THE BLOB in several scenes.  He also has several characters named after directors such as Chris Romero and Cynthia Cronenberg.  His writing style is witty and clever.  But, NIGHT OF THE CREEPS isn't just comedy.  Its horror is effective and quite gory for the time.  The plot line flows effortlessly from 50's homage to zombies, to alien invaders, to a suicidal detective with a dark secret.  The humor is both laugh out loud and subtle.  The acting is outstanding with Jason Lively giving a fine performance as the sometimes-bumbling Chris and Steve Marshall plays his wisecracking friend JC with believability.  Jill Whitlow as the girlfriend is adorably cute!  But, it's Tom Atkins as the over-the-hill detective that steals this.  Typecast as a police officer in many of his movies, he brings the same poignancy to this as he did in the MY BLOODY VALENTINE remake and LETHAL WEAPON.  I am very pleased that this, along with Dekker's follow-up movie, the superb THE MONSTER SQUAD, now both have official DVD releases.  Now, raise your hands and repeat after me "I solemnly swear to toss my bootlegged copies in the trash where they belong and to buy the newly restored official copies.”  Thrill me!

Enjoy!  And you will!







MSTJunkie

11 September, 2010

“The Best [Euro-Horror] Movies You’ve Probably Never Seen”

For fans of European Horror Films, Amando De Ossorio is one of the legendary directors of the sub-genre.  Not as well-known as Fulci or Argento, not as prolific as Franco or as talented as Bava, he nonetheless is remembered as one of the greatest European film-makers ever, based solely on his iconic creations, the Knights Templars of the BLIND DEAD series of films.
Beginning in 1971, with the release of LA NOCHE DEL TERROR CIEGO  ~aka~  TOMBS OF THE BLIND DEAD, a unique form of undead menace graced the screens of theaters and Drive-Ins in Europe and North America.  While similar in style to the Romero Zombie-Verse of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, De Ossorio’s Satan-worshipping, blood-drinking, flesh-eating Knights of the Egyptian Cross were in a class all alone.  Evil in life, they became even more so after death, chasing down victims on gray-black spectral chargers, hunting them down by the sound of their beating hearts.
Based on the historical Crusaders known as Knights Templars, De Ossorio’s version, to put it mildly, deviates significantly from the historical record.  These Knights are a cult of Devil-worshippers, executed for their crimes, blinded so they could not threaten people, even after death.  But neither killing nor blinding them kept them from seeking out fresh prey through a series of four films from 1971 to 1975, continuing from the first with EL ATAQUE DE LOS MUERTOS SIN OJOS  ~aka~  RETURN OF THE BLIND DEAD; EL BUQUE MALDITO  ~aka~  THE GHOST GALLEON; and LA NOCHE DE LAS GAVIOTAS  ~aka~  NIGHT OF THE SEAGULLS.
While the quality of the series varied from film to film, hitting it’s nadir with the very weak EL BUQUE MALDITO in 1974, it was always stylish and atmospheric, highlighting De Ossorio’s talent as a director and photographer if not as a screenwriter.  The best of the series, at least in my opinion, was 1972’s EL ATAQUE DE LOS MUERTOS SIN OJOS.  Not only does it retain the stylistic elegance of the first film, but throws in some of the best action scenes of the series, including a suspenseful scene where the survivors of the initial Templar massacre struggle to rescue a young child caught outside with the dead knights.
Now those of you who are regular readers of this column know that I’m a big fan of Euro-Horror, and you probably know why.  The answer is a simple one:  Innovation.
Let’s examine one year, a year that featured the release of several landmark Horror Films—1960.  While Hollywood was churning out such blockbusters as THE AMAZING TRANSPARENT MAN and THE LEECH WOMAN, European film-makers were producing bona-fide classics like ET MOURIR DE PLASIR  ~aka~  BLOOD AND ROSES and LA MASCHERA DEL DEMONIO  ~aka~  BLACK SUNDAY.  Does that mean there were no good American Horror Films produced that year?  Hardly.  Am I trying to imply that Hollywood was totally incapable of original, innovative Horror?  No, though that statement’s not far from the truth.  One of the greatest, most innovative Horror Films ever made, Hitchcock’s PSYCHO, came out in 1960.  THE TIME MACHINE and THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER were also excellent 1960 releases, though neither was exceptionally innovative or original.
Innovation, though, is something that Hollywood finds itself unwilling to do.  Whether from fear of failure, or lack of imagination, Hollywood simply cannot get its collective thumb out long enough to come up with an original thought.  While this syndrome has become more pronounced of late, it’s hardly a recent phenomenon, as demonstrated by our look at 1960.
However, European directors felt no such constraints… or if they did, they didn’t let them affect the quality of their work.  Directors like Bava, Argento, Fulci, Rollin, and Franco may not have always been successful, but they made movies that were unmistakably their own, films that stood apart from the common herd.  You may not have liked their work, but you damn sure recognized it as theirs.
De Ossorio was that type of director.  Though his movies have their share of detractors, and his themes left him open to personal attack, (most often describing him as “misogynistic”…) he made the films that he wanted to make, and they were unlike anything else.  From the history he constructed for the Templars, to the distinctive design of their reanimated corpses, even to the unique method of filming the Blind Dead Knights in slow-motion that so effectively imparted a sense of the unreal, an air of supernatural, to the Templars, these films were different.  The combination of these factors, and others, have made these films some of the best of European Horror, even though few Americans are, or rather, were, familiar with them.  And those who have seen them probably saw a heavily edited VHS release, which could hardly convey the true quality of De Ossorio’s work.
That hopefully changed in 2005, when Blue Underground released an absolutely breath-taking boxed set, The Blind Dead Collection.  Beautifully restored to their original release condition, with the original language tracks in place, it’s easy to see just why these films were so highly thought of when they first hit the screens of European cinemas.  By the time they reached the American Drive-Ins and Grindhouses, cuts had already been made that reduced the films’ effectiveness.  The movies were each cut further in order to fit into broadcast slots, as well as making them Television friendly.  Along the way, De Ossorio’s original concepts became so muddied and disguised that in direct comparison, they seem like different films.
And thanks to Blue Underground, that direct comparison, at least for LA NOCHE DEL TERROR CIEGO, is easily accomplished.  In addition to the original wide-screen Spanish release of De Ossorio’s masterpiece, they’ve included the edited, dubbed, pan-and-scan U.S. video release in its entirety.  Watching them back-to-back, as I did recently, only made me appreciate the original all the more.  The plot, which seems to make little sense in the edited version, jumps into crystal clarity in the original.  Though I speak not a word of Spanish, the dialogue between the principal characters became far more comprehensible in the original, sub-titled version than in the one where I could actually understand what the actors were saying.
When I say that these are the best Euro-Horror films you’ve never seen, I’m fully aware that many of you probably have seen them; may even have the beat-up, fading VHS’s in your collection, just as I did.  You might even now be composing angry e-mails, ready to inform me just how big a fathead I am.  Fine.  But unless you’ve seen these movies the way they were meant to be seen, the way De Ossorio wanted them to be seen, then just hit that delete button.
Because, unless you have seen them in their original form, they are the best Euro-Horror movies you’ve never seen.

17 May, 2008

DVD Review: FIDO

Title: FIDO

Year of Release—Film: 2006


Year of Release—DVD: 2007

DVD Label: Lion’s Gate Home Entertainment





THE MOVIE

In the past 40 years since George Romero changed the world of Horror Films with NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, we’ve been treated to virtually every reanimated corpse—end of the world scenario possible, including the ZomCom (Zombie Comedy…). The best of these, 2004’s SHAUN OF THE DEAD, worked on multiple levels, combining truly first-class zombie action and gore with both a romantic comedy and a stoner buddy-pic. Now, Canadian director Andrew Currie brings us what might be the first Zombie coming-of-age tale, in FIDO.


Set in a bizarre world where life is locked in the 1950’s, Timmy Robinson is an average kid… picked on some, generally ignored by his parents, not too dissimilar from how many of us grew up. Until the day his mother purchases a domesticated zombie as a household servant.


That right, folks… thanks to the geniuses at ZomCon, you too can own your very own zombie slave. They don’t need to sleep, they don’t need to eat, and with their patented Domestication Collars in place, they’re as docile as kittens. At least, as long as the collars are activated, that is.
When the Robinson’s new zombie accidentally slips his electronic leash and eats the neighbor, it sets off a chain reaction that endangers the entire community of Willard; traumatizes Timmy’s death-obsessed father, who has a phobia of zombies; and leads his mother to question the meaning of her life.


Currie does a fairly convincing job selling the world as it is following the Zombie Wars, though the idea that the survivors of such a war would tolerate zombies in such close proximity is a little hard to accept. Still it works more often than not, thanks in large part to the excellent cast, led by Billy Connolly as Fido, the Robinson’s zombie. Carrie-Ann Moss, as Timmy’s mother, and Dylan Baker, as his father, are very well-cast, and do a splendid job with the material provided, which is at times very weak. In addition, Henry Czerny, as Mr. Bottoms, the Head of Security at ZomCon, turns in an excellent performance, with perhaps the best line in the film. (“I’d take Dee-Dee’s head off in a second if I had to.”)


While the premise is interesting, and what action there is is well done, far too much of the film is given over to long expository scenes where the family comes to terms with the realization that Fido’s not just some nameless monster; that there’s still a trace of his humanity left, and in one way or another, that humanity touches every member of the household.


While there are some humorous moments in the film, it’s hard for me to describe it as a Comedy; in fact, it really doesn’t lend itself to an easy categorization. Perhaps The Adventures of Lassie, as seen by Salvador Dali, would be the best way to describe it. Currie even spoofs this at one point, as Fido is sent running home to fetch help when Timmy is in trouble.


On the whole, while it is an entertaining movie, it’s not a particularly satisfying one. The ending is especially weak, with a contrived, cutesy tone that utterly fails the believability test.


THE DISC

Lion’s Gate Home Entertainment has yet to turn out a bad DVD release, and this one is no exception. A beautiful anamorphic widescreen print, crystal clear sound, subtitles… Lion’s Gate always gives you the most bang for your buck.



THE SPECIAL FEATURES

For a low-budget indie film that is probably known to less than ten percent of Horror fandom, Lion’s Gate Home Entertainment has given this one the royal treatment, loading it full of special features. Most however, aren’t quite worth the effort.


There’s the obligatory making-of segment; interesting, but hardly necessary. This isn’t a film with a lot of “How’d they do that?” moments. There’s also an enjoyable montage of Connolly’s transformation into the zombie Fido, though once again, it adds very little to the package overall.
For this Unimonster, the special features didn’t alter my opinion of the DVD in either direction. It’s better to have them there than to not, I suppose… there’s just nothing that grabs the viewer’s attention and adds value to the purchase.



IN CONCLUSION

I always applaud filmmakers pushing Horror in new directions, testing the boundaries of the genre. However, as with all such endeavors, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. With FIDO, it does work more often than not… barely. The premise, even in terms of Horror Films, is wildly implausible; the humor, what there is of it, is forced; and the lack of action, suspense, and horror kill it in the end.


I have seen comments on some of the boards that this movie was funnier than SHAUN OF THE DEAD. All I can say in reply is that I must have seen a different movie. Contrary to what other reviewers, and the producers themselves, might try to tell you, this isn’t a comedy. My problem with it is, I’m not quite sure what it is. And I doubt the filmmakers really know either. It’s not a bad movie; in fact, it’s occasionally very good. But for me to recommend a buy, ‘occasionally very good…’ just isn’t good enough.


But if weird, quirky, offbeat films are your cup of tea, then I would suggest you do what I did, and go the BlockBuster Bargain Bin route. When I’m paying a grand total of $21.40 (including tax…) for four recently released DVD’s, a movie has to be incredibly bad for me to feel like I’m being ripped off. Don’t get me wrong, it has happened… can we all say SNAKES ON A PLANE? Still, it’s a lot easier to shrug off $5.35 than $20.For most, though, I recommend renting it. It’s just unusual enough that a lot of viewers will be turned off by it. Find out if you’re in that group before you lay out any more of your hard-earned cash than necessary.










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09 February, 2008

“The Best Euro-Horror Movies You’ve Probably Never Seen”

For fans of European Horror Films, Amando De Ossorio is one of the legendary directors of the sub-genre. Not as well-known as Fulci or Argento, not as prolific as Franco or as talented as Bava, he nonetheless is remembered as one of the greatest European film-makers ever, based solely on his iconic creations, the Knights Templars of the BLIND DEAD series of films.

Beginning in 1971, with the release of LA NOCHE DEL TERROR CIEGO ~aka~ TOMBS OF THE BLIND DEAD, a unique form of undead menace graced the screens of theaters and Drive-Ins in Europe and North America. While similar in style to the Romero Zombie-Verse of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, De Ossorio’s Satan-worshipping, blood-drinking, flesh-eating Knights of the Egyptian Cross were in a class all alone. Evil in life, they became even more so after death, chasing down victims on gray-black spectral chargers, hunting them down by the sound of their beating hearts.

Based on the historical Crusaders known as Knights Templars, De Ossorio’s version, to put it mildly, deviates significantly from the historical record. These Knights are a cult of Devil-worshippers, executed for their crimes, blinded so they could not threaten people, even after death. But neither killing nor blinding them kept them from seeking out fresh prey through a series of four films from 1971 to 1975, continuing from the first with EL ATAQUE DE LOS MUERTOS SIN OJOS ~aka~ RETURN OF THE BLIND DEAD; EL BUQUE MALDITO ~aka~ THE GHOST GALLEON; and LA NOCHE DE LAS GAVIOTAS ~aka~ NIGHT OF THE SEAGULLS.

While the quality of the series varied from film to film, hitting it’s nadir with the very weak EL BUQUE MALDITO in 1974, it was always stylish and atmospheric, highlighting De Ossorio’s talent as a director and photographer if not as a screenwriter. The best of the series, at least in my opinion, was 1972’s EL ATAQUE DE LOS MUERTOS SIN OJOS. Not only does it retain the stylistic elegance of the first film, but throws in some of the best action scenes of the series, including a suspenseful scene where the survivors of the initial Templar massacre struggle to rescue a young child caught outside with the dead knights.

Now those of you who are regular readers of this column know that I’m a big fan of Euro-Horror, and you probably know why. The answer is a simple one: Innovation.

Let’s examine one year, a year that featured the release of several landmark Horror Films—1960. While Hollywood was churning out such blockbusters as THE AMAZING TRANSPARENT MAN and THE LEECH WOMAN, European film-makers were producing bona-fide classics like ET MOURIR DE PLASIR ~aka~ BLOOD AND ROSES and LA MASCHERA DEL DEMONIO ~aka~ BLACK SUNDAY. Does that mean there were no good American Horror Films produced that year? Hardly. Am I trying to imply that Hollywood was totally incapable of original, innovative Horror? No, though that statement’s not far from the truth. One of the greatest, most innovative Horror Films ever made, Hitchcock’s PSYCHO, came out in 1960. THE TIME MACHINE and THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER were also excellent 1960 releases, though neither was exceptionally innovative or original.

Innovation, though, is something that Hollywood finds itself unwilling to do. Whether from fear of failure, or lack of imagination, Hollywood simply cannot get its collective thumb out long enough to come up with an original thought. While this syndrome has become more pronounced of late, it’s hardly a recent phenomenon, as demonstrated by our look at 1960.

However, European directors felt no such constraints… or if they did, they didn’t let them affect the quality of their work. Directors like Bava, Argento, Fulci, Rollin, and Franco may not have always been successful, but they made movies that were unmistakably their own, films that stood apart from the common herd. You may not have liked their work, but you damn sure recognized it as theirs.

De Ossorio was that type of director. Though his movies have their share of detractors, and his themes left him open to personal attack, (most often describing him as “misogynistic”…) he made the films that he wanted to make, and they were unlike anything else. From the history he constructed for the Templars, to the distinctive design of their reanimated corpses, even to the unique method of filming the Blind Dead Knights in slow-motion that so effectively imparted a sense of the unreal, an air of supernatural, to the Templars, these films were different. The combination of these factors, and others, have made these films some of the best of European Horror, even though few Americans are, or rather, were, familiar with them. And those who have seen them probably saw a heavily edited VHS release, which could hardly convey the true quality of De Ossorio’s work.

That hopefully changed in 2005, when Blue Underground released an absolutely breath-taking boxed set, The Blind Dead Collection. Beautifully restored to their original release condition, with the original language tracks in place, it’s easy to see just why these films were so highly thought of when they first hit the screens of European cinemas. By the time they reached the American Drive-Ins and Grindhouses, cuts had already been made that reduced the films’ effectiveness. The movies were each cut further in order to fit into broadcast slots, as well as making them Television friendly. Along the way, De Ossorio’s original concepts became so muddied and disguised that in direct comparison, they seem like different films.

And thanks to Blue Underground, that direct comparison, at least for LA NOCHE DEL TERROR CIEGO, is easily accomplished. In addition to the original wide-screen Spanish release of De Ossorio’s masterpiece, they’ve included the edited, dubbed, pan-and-scan U.S. video release in its entirety. Watching them back-to-back, as I did recently, only made me appreciate the original all the more. The plot, which seems to make little sense in the edited version, jumps into crystal clarity in the original. Though I speak not a word of Spanish, the dialogue between the principal characters became far more comprehensible in the original, sub-titled version than in the one where I could actually understand what the actors were saying.

When I say that these are the best Euro-Horror films you’ve never seen, I’m fully aware that many of you probably have seen them; may even have the beat-up, fading VHS’s in your collection, just as I did. You might even now be composing angry e-mails, ready to inform me just how big a fathead I am. Fine. But unless you’ve seen these movies the way they were meant to be seen, the way De Ossorio wanted them to be seen, then just hit that delete button.

Because, unless you have seen them in their original form, they are the best Euro-Horror movies you’ve never seen.


















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05 January, 2008

DVD Review: SHAUN OF THE DEAD

Title: SHAUN OF THE DEAD

Year of Release—Film: 2004

Year of Release—DVD: 2004

DVD Label: Universal



THE MOVIE

Easily the best movie released in the past five or six years, SHAUN OF THE DEAD is one of those rare films that exceed all my expectations, surprising me with the most entertaining movie I’ve seen in a long time. At first glance, you’re tempted to dismiss it as just another Romero-inspired zombie movie; that was my initial impression of the film. Then I got the DVD and watched it. Any thoughts of this being “…just another zombie movie” were soon dashed from my mind with the first viewing of this superb film from Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg.

The movie starts outs as a fairly typical Brit stoner-romantic comedy, as we meet Shaun, (Pegg, who also co-wrote the script, in a tremendous performance…) the eponymous hero of our tale. Shaun is your average twenty-something guy… he works in a discount appliance store, visits his mom and step-dad every other week or so, tries to keep his girlfriend Liz happy… all while trying to keep his best friend Ed and their other flatmate Pete from killing each other, and himself pleasantly ‘self-medicated’.

It’s a tricky balancing act, but he manages to pull it off until one day when all hell breaks loose. Shaun forgets to make dinner reservations for a big night out with Liz, who promptly dumps him when he suggests they spend the evening at the local pub. He further alienates her by trying to give her flowers originally purchased for his mother and forgetting to remove the card inscribed “To a Wonderful Mum…” He and Ed get totally blitzed, stagger home, and wake up an enraged Pete, who has to be at work in a few hours.

And to top it off, the dead are rising to feast on the flesh of the living. Now, Shaun has to sort his life out and somehow win back the woman he loves, while dealing with a horde of cannibalistic zombies.

Before I saw this movie, I would’ve laughed at the suggestion that anyone could come up with yet another original take on George Romero’s “Zombie-Verse.” Since Romero’s DEAD quadrilogy began with the premiere of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD in 1968, there have been hundreds of films that, to put it kindly, have ‘borrowed’ from the themes and imagery of the Romero films. A few, such as De Ossorio’s BLIND DEAD films or Fulci’s ZOMBI 2, have actually been well-done, original takes on a similar plot.

Most however have been little more than outright clones, with no originality, no imagination, and no talent whatsoever associated with them. I had assumed that every bit of originality and inspiration had been wrung from Romero’s premise, and you can’t imagine my joy at having been proven wrong.

Pegg and Frost have a unique chemistry together which completely convinces the viewer of their friendship, much the same type of chemistry that made Bob Hope and Bing Crosby such a great team. Their on-screen chemistry was great because played off each other so well, with an impeccable sense of timing, and Pegg and Frost’s works for the same reason; plus, they truly are good friends, friends who’ve spent many nights in pubs, just like Shaun and Ed.



THE DISC

Like most offerings from Universal, the SHAUN… DVD is superbly done, with perfect video and audio transfer, with audio tracks and subtitles in multiple languages. Universal put their best efforts into this disc, and it really shows.


THE SPECIAL FEATURES

This disc is as loaded with extras as you’re likely to see in anything not labeled “Ultimate Collector’s Edition.” Twenty-nine minutes of deleted scenes and outtakes; thirty-five minutes of behind-the-scenes footage; seven minutes of extended bits from the film, and assorted stills, posters, advertising images, and other goodies. And that doesn’t even mention my favorite feature: The Zomb-O-Meter.

For those of you familiar with VH-1’s Pop-Up Videos from the ‘90’s, the Zomb-O-Meter works in essentially the same way, displaying trivia and info about the movie along the bottom, in the style of a subtitle. Everyone should watch the movie at least once with the feature turned on; believe me, it adds an entirely new level to your enjoyment of the film.



IN CONCLUSION

To say that this is one of my favorite movies would be an understatement… I truly consider it to be the best Horror Film of the past decade or so. The list price is low enough, at just under $15, but it was selling at Amazon for $9.88, and at DeepDiscount DVD for 40¢ less. Either way, this is one movie everyone should see, and see often.














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